My Buddy

Before Ethan was born, my mom warned me that the first few weeks with a new baby are tough because newborns are so needy and take, take, take without giving you anything in return. I didn't mind too much because it was all so novel and exciting, but she was right (as usual). Then around 6 weeks or so, Ethan rewarded us with his first glorious smiles. Little by little, he started giving back more and more - a coo, a snuggle, a giggle, a "Mama" - little gifts served up to his novice parents to remind them that they were doing ok at the job.

Watching our parents take care of our grandparents, I realize this is a continuum. When a baby first enters the world, the parent-child relationship is one dimensional. The parents do everything for the child, and the child doesn't do a whole lot for the parents (other than serving as an alarm clock lest the parents try to oversleep). From birth, that balance starts to shift, ever so slightly, and the roles of parent and child change as the child grows and develops and can begin to give back to his parents.

We are (happily) still at the far left side of this continuum with our boys, where we do most of the care-giving, and they do most of the care-taking, but it is beginning to change a bit. Ben was away visiting family this past weekend, and for the first time, I didn't view the kiddos as all work. For the first time, I was actually thankful that they were there to keep me company, rather than wishing that Ben had taken the rascals away with him (is that bad?) and left me some peace. Ethan, in particular, was awesome. He was legitimately helpful in every way - weeding the garden, setting the table, bringing me things when I was tied up with Adam, etc. But more than his help, I really appreciated his company. He was my dinner date on Saturday night (lobster, of course), my conversation partner throughout the weekend, my excuse to go get ice cream (again). In general, he was a great little buddy to his Mom, who would have otherwise been pretty lonely with Ben away. Watching your kids grow up so fast is bittersweet, but the sweet part sure is lovely.

The Witching Hour

I used to say that early evening was my favorite time of day. There's something about the fading light in the sky and the quiet calm that really relaxes me. When I was a senior in college, my friend Katie and I used to take a blanket and a big ole jug of wine down to the shores of Johnson Pond nearly every night to solve the world's problems while enjoying this special time of day. This was, of course, before children. Nowadays, the early evening hours are anything but relaxing - I often feel like I am in a mad sprint from 5:30 until the boys are down for the night. Everyone (including yours truly) is hungry, tired, and cranky, and everyone needs everything "RIGHT NOW!". Between cooking for, feeding, and cleaning up after my three boys, I am lucky if I actually get to sit down and shovel a few bites of food into my mouth. Ben always wonders why I eat my dinner so fast - it's because otherwise, there would be no dinner for me.

Despite the hectic frenzy, this is still one of my favorite times of the day. From dinnertime to bedtime, our lives are only about each other. Our family. There is something very rewarding about making sure that everyone's bellies are full, that their ears are clean and their teeth are brushed, that they've had some good stories and cuddle time, and that they're all tucked in tight for the night. It makes me feel like a good mom.

When there was just Ethan, bathtime was Ben's job (it will be again at some point - he just doesn't know it yet). But with two wriggly, slippery boys to clean, we've adopted a man-on-man strategy. I've actually come to love this nightly chore - the boys are so adorable playing in the bath together, and Ethan has even started washing himself (sort of).

There are a lot of discussions about which soap belongs to whom, whose bath toys are whose, and who gets which towel. Here is Adam in his frog towel, not to be confused with Ethan's polar bear towel.

These matching car PJs are a big hit, and help convince Ethan that he really does want to put his pajamas on.

Our Nation's Birthday, Stockwell Style

Every family has its special holiday. For my family, it's Christmas. My family goes absolutely nuts over Christmas, from the "Santa explosion", to the ridiculous amount of presents under the tree, to the feast after feast, to the umpteen wonderful family traditions that surround this holiday - we do Christmas right. But when it comes to that quintessential summer holiday, that true celebration of summer, no one does the 4th of July like the Stockwells. For those of you who have had the pleasure of celebrating America's birthday with the Stockwell clan, you know exactly what I'm talking about - this is one wild, wacky, and wonderful weekend. For those of you who haven't been so lucky, I'll give you a quick synopsis of the fun involved.

First, there are plenty of parades to watch/participate in. There's the town parade, in which we marched for the first time this year. There is a Stockwell float for all the kids to ride on, but Ethan was petrified of the tractor driving the float, so Dad got to carry him the whole way while Adam and I rode on the float. Ethan really preferred watching the parade instead, ooohhing and aaahing at every vehicle that passed. After the parade we got to watch a bunch of rubber ducks race down the creek. As I said, wacky.

Then there's the family parade. This is even wackier, because it's the only parade (that I know of) that has no audience. The whole Stockwell clan dresses up in costumes and parades around the compound. We stop at the tennis courts to recite the Pledge of Allegiance and to pay respects to those no longer with us, then head to the playhouse for skits and awards. This year, we won the "Loony Award" for our rendition of The White Sneaker Gang, the Next Generation.

The funny thing about these costumes is that they always need a lot of explanation - no one dresses up like a cat, or Dracula, or a fireman, or something obvious like that. Our costume was an homage to the White Sneaker Gang of the 60s - when Tom and his brothers/cousins (a whole gaggle of boys) used to wear white sneakers and get into lots of mischief. Our boys are two of a whole new generation of boys (ten boys in a row!) who will likely be creating similar mischief in the not too distant future. Hence the inspiration for our costume.

Besides the parades, there are lots of other fun activities surrounding the Fourth. There's the Wilkins Community Breakfast, where the whole community gathers for a delicious spread of homemade muffins and donuts, eggs, bacon, sausage, pancakes, etc. It is one of my favorite events of the year, and it seems like Ethan is following in his Mom's footsteps. I have never seen this kid eat so much breakfast in his life. The kids' portion was not quite big enough, and he ended up scarfing down much of his parents' breakfasts too.

And then there are the usual lake activities - shuffleboard, swimming, playing on the beach, bocce, and driving Grandpa's boat:

But my most favorite part of the celebration, and what makes the Stockwell compound so special, is the gathering of extended family. I'm not sure how many family members were present this past weekend, but I know it was dozens and dozens. Cousins and second cousins, great aunts and great uncles, all get to know one another again at the lake every summer, catching up on the events of the past year, meeting new offspring, and sharing memories of summers past. It is unlike anything I have ever seen, and it is truly wonderful. It is especially fun to watch the next generation of Stockwells begin to interact and get to know each other. Ethan and his third cousin Aidan really enjoyed each other's company this past weekend. They were holding hands most of the weekend, off exploring the woods and beach together.

Adam and his second cousin Caz had their fun too. Adam helped Caz work on his tummy time, and Caz showed Adam how to smile big for the camera.

I look forward to watching the boys form these unique and lasting bonds with their extended family, and will encourage them to do so every step of the way. I am a little scared to see what the next generation of the White Sneaker Gang has in store for us, but I'm sure it will be fun to watch!

Finally!

The weather gods listened! Hooray for sunshine! When we came down for breakfast this morning, Ethan said "It's not raining Mommy! Beach?". He didn't have to ask me twice. We grabbed the beach bag that has been packed and ready (and not used) for weeks and enjoyed a morning in the glorious sunshine. There was some confusion over who's hat was whose, and the boys definitely ended up with the wrong ones, but at least they agreed to wear hats, I guess.

On the way home, we stopped for some ice cream (a decent toddler lunch, right?) and Adam enjoyed his very first taste. He loved it (obviously). I don't want to be greedy, but let's keep this weather coming! Summer is finally here!

P.S. We had a great holiday weekend at the lake - pictures to come...

Here Comes the Rain Again

Seriously? Another rainy day? July 2nd...really? Downpours and 59 degrees? I think the weather gods got my order confused with someone else's, because I am pretty sure I didn't order this. I enjoy the occasional rainy day, but 30 in a row? Not so much. You know it's bad when Ethan comes down every morning and says "It's raining again?!". Even a two year old notices. Whenever we get a momentary break in the downpours, he screams "It's not raining Mommy! It's not raining! Outside!!". Sadly, this is beginning to feel like the new

normal. I just reach for the jeans and long sleeves every morning without even bothering to check the temperatures - why would they be any different? Sigh. We did get a few minutes (that's an exaggeration, but I'm entitled) of sun this past weekend, and boy did we soak it up. Here's Adam getting his once-monthly dose of Vitamin D.

One of the perks of living in Maine/the boonies is that there are literally three strawberry farms to choose from within a couple miles of our house. We went to the one just down the road, and Ethan enjoyed his first berry-picking/eating adventure.

Adam enjoyed it too - especially picking the leaves and trying to eat them. It was a bit of a challenge picking with these two...

The rain returned Sunday, but we didn't let that stop us from going to the Scarborough Farmer's Market. When we lived in Brookline, Ethan and I would go to the Farmer's Market every week all summer long. We both loved it, and miss it very much, so we were happy to discover the Scarborough market this past weekend. Although not quite the same (no ice cream!), it's a good enough substitute. The poor farmers hate this rain even more than we do, and were lamenting their lack of produce to sell. But we managed to find a few yummy treasures to bring home with us.

We're off to the lake this long weekend, and really, really, hoping for some sunshine. Happy 4th of July! Or is it the 4th of March? I'm not so sure...

Birthday Week

Two very special ladies are celebrating very special milestones this week. Ethan and Adam are incredibly blessed to have loving, doting, and adoring grandmas on both sides of the family. Watching the boys interact with their grandmothers fills my heart with joy. Ethan has such special relationships with both his Noni and his Grandma (I'm sure Adam does too, but Ethan's are more evident). These wonderful women are always thinking of our kids - calling to check in, worrying about them when they're sick, finding a certain toy that Ethan or Adam just "has to have", bragging about their "incredibly gifted" grandsons, etc., etc.

These women are not only second moms to Ethan and Adam, but they are the moms I look to most often for mothering advice and insight into this crazy adventure called parenting. They're always there to listen to me gripe about the kids' latest "issues" and help brainstorm strategies for dealing with them. They give me perspective and wisdom, and I always value their opinions, even if we disagree on the solution. (sorry Mom, but I stand by my swaddle. :) ) They're eternally eager to listen to us brag about the boys' latest achievements, and to "oooh" and "aaah" as if Ethan had just learned to read Latin or Adam had just returned from running a mile. These women have many, many things to be proud of accomplishing during their 60 years on earth, but personally, I think they should be most proud of being grandmothers, a role which they have perfected in every way.

Happy 60th Birthday to our wonderful moms!

Crib Antics

We never know what awaits us when we check on our boys every night, or when we go in to get them in the morning. Their sleep positions always make us chuckle, and Ethan is often proudly undressed (luckily he has yet to figure out how to take his diaper off - that would be a real treat to walk into).

Last night we checked on our sleeping polar bear cub:

And this morning, we caught our little escape artist trying to get out of his crib, chubby legs first:

They're both napping now - we'll see what we find when they wake up!