Reading Rainbows

Ladies and gentleman, I dare say we have a reader!  Ethan has been "reading" to us for awhile now, but it has been more of the "I've memorized this book and will now recite it back to you" variety, or the "Let me look at the picture to remember the words" variety, or the very painful "Let me sound out every single word very very slowly and with lots of mistakes" variety.  Oh, and that last variety comes with lots and lots of frustration on the part of my little perfectionist, making the whole experience a barrel of fun!  But last night we had a bit of a breakthrough, as Ethan read us a whole book, pretty much all by himself.  There were moments where he needed some help sounding out words, but there were also moments where he'd read a whole page with no help and with instant recognition of many of the words within.  But the biggest breakthrough of all was in our guy's confidence.  He begged to read the whole book himself, even though bedtime was getting later and later and a certain younger brother was repeatedly asking for Mom or Dad to take over.  And when he finished that last page - that smile, that glow, that pride - I wished I could have bottled it up and saved it for the next time he's overcome with frustration.  It was like suddenly There Was an Old Lady Who Swallowed Fly Guy had opened up this whole new world of enchantment and opportunity.  As I kissed him good night, Ethan said "I did it, Mommy!  I read that whole book!  Those Fly Guy books are perfect for me - can we read another one tomorrow?  And go get all the ones they have at the library so I can read more?".  And as I walked out of the room: "Mommy, my legs can't stop moving I'm so excited about reading."  This proud mama thinks it doesn't get much better than that.  Seeing your child burst with pride and excitement over his newfound skills is one of the sweetest and most fulfilling parts of parenthood.

And because I didn't get Ethan's reading debut on tape, I am posting a video of another of his newly mastered skills - skating.  Ethan and Adam spent this past weekend at Grandma and Grandpa's while Mom and Dad got an amazing and needed getaway (thanks again Tom and Sue!), and had much opportunity to practice their skating.  Ethan was so proud of his new abilities that he asked Mom and Dad to meet him at the rink on Sunday to show them off.

To the Rescue

We are in superhero heaven (or hell, depending on the day and my mood) around here.  We read, draw, discuss, dress, and act all things superhero on a daily basis.  In fact, I'm quite sure that one of our little superheroes really, truly believes he is [insert superhero du jour] and that his mission in life is to kick those bad guys to the curb with legitimate high kicks and "hi-yahs!".  Pity to whomever (usually Mom) gets in the way of said kicks, his path as he sprints around the house, or his fun when his uniform is inevitably taken away until he can calm his superhero urges waaaaaay down.  Despite repeated attempts on Mom and Dad's part to convince the mini avengers that superheroes are generally calm, gentle, and quiet creatures, chasing imaginary bad guys with as much volume and speed as can be mustered appears to be much more fun.  Why can't Marvel come up with a new silent superhero who stealthily and quickly cleans up all his toys and dirty clothes?  Oh, and who's superpower is listening?  Now that would be my kind of superhero - instead, we have this cast of characters:

Superman

Coy Superman

Serious and snuggly Batman

CAPTAIN OF THE UNIVERSE!!!!

Captain of the Universe's alter ego, Adam Stockwell, running the bad guys out of town (or from gymnastics class)

Sweet Six

Ah, six...I believe this is my most favorite age yet.  We are most certainly in that sweet sweet spot between babyhood and tweendom, where Ethan has become his own person, with abilities and independence and self-control, but where Mom and Dad are still the centers of his little universe.  And oh how I cherish this six-year old son of mine.  Throughout his six years in our lives, Ethan has of course grown and developed, but so much of his character has remained unchanged.  He is one-of-a-kind, as all kids are, and here is what I think is so special about my guy:

• Ethan exhibits (and always has) patience beyond his years.  No other almost six-year old I know would sit through his mom's hair appointment (2+ hours) one day and then his mom's nail appointment (1+ hour) the very next day, without nary a complaint.  He is (usually) happy to tag along on whatever errands I need to do, especially if they are described as special outings with just Mommy.  
• ...which brings me to the next thing I love about Ethan - his love of planning.  With two boys, I never expected I'd have a partner in decorating and party planning and shopping...but I do!  Ethan loves chatting with me about whatever event is coming up, planning the food and decorations, shopping for supplies, and even picking out his outfit.  On the Wednesday before his friend party, he asked me to wash his Spiderman shirt because he couldn't imagine wearing anything else to his superhero party.  While getting him to set the table on a daily basis is sometimes a challenge, setting the dining room table with linens and silver and candles is probably one of his most favorite activities.
• Ethan has always been our little helper.  From the time he could crawl, he wanted to be involved in whatever the adults were doing, even if it was hard work.  And while I know that the tides will turn and we'll have to beg him to clean his room someday, I am happy to report that he is still Mr. Helpful.  He shovels snow, does the dishes, folds and puts away his laundry, cooks, cleans, helps Daddy in the garden, and loves a good organizational project.  And while his help is not always on my schedule or exactly to my standards, I will say it is actually, truly helpful at this point.
• Perhaps what surprises Ben and me most about Ethan is his creativity and artistic nature.  Somehow these two Type A, analytical geeks created a left-brained lover of all things creative.  Sure, Ethan's got his Type A traits too (more on that later), but he is so much more creative than either of his parents.  Whenever we have a spare moment, he'll drag out his art supplies and a blank piece of paper and just create.  He loves making books (which will be easier with the new stapler he got for his birthday) about dinosaurs and Angry Birds and pirates and his family.  One of my favorite parts of the week is when Ethan comes home from school on Fridays and shares his folder of work with me.  We sit down and look at it all, but he is always proudest of his artwork.  And as a completely biased critic, I am usually quite impressed!
• But what I love most about Ethan is his kind and gentle soul.  He is a truly compassionate child, with not an enemy on this earth (he gets that from his dad, trust me).  I am fortunate to be able to volunteer in his class this year, and have gotten to know some of the dynamics of the classroom.  Even in kindergarten, there are cliques and popular kids, but Ethan does not involve himself with any of that.  When he made his list for birthday invitations, I was thrilled with the kids he had chosen to invite - they weren't just the louder, extroverted, magnetic boys, but also the eccentric tomboy and the quiet boy who often seems lonely in class.  I hope that as Ethan continues to navigate his school years, he keeps this sense of kindness and empathy and friendship and stays true to his own choices.

So what's not to love about Ethan?  Well, of course, I love every piece of him, but he is most definitely my drama king.  I somehow thought we would avoid drama by having two of the male gender, but no, Ethan loves him some drama.  Our boy is beyond sensitive (a good thing, right?) and feels his emotions in a big way.  So that all leads to some ups and downs that make me fear for the time when hormones kick in and add to his moodiness.  Ethan is also a worrier.  He bolts out of bed every morning worried.  Worried that he will miss the bus, worried about what to wear, worried about how much to eat for breakfast.  I too am a worrier, and am trying my hardest to give him the confidence and flexibility and security to overcome this curse.

But mostly, Ethan is just pure joy.  At six, he is into "big conversations".  It all started with a car ride with Daddy, and a discussion about our family tree.  Since then, every time we get in the car, Ethan asks what we can talk about, whether it be evolution or homonyms or politics or what happens when we die.  But at six, Ethan is also still into sitting on my lap for a story, and being read to when he can really start reading to himself.  He is well-rounded, and has moved beyond the obsessions of the toddler years to enjoying a broad variety of interests.  Apart from his art and book-making, Ethan loves playing outside (especially in the snow), riding his bike, doing puzzles, building with Legos or Lincoln Logs, racing cars around the house, being chased by his brother, playing games, and reading chapter books.  He loves being around others but also loves a healthy dose of alone time.  He adores his brother beyond belief and enjoys playing the good guy by encouraging Adam to do his dirty work.  He considers himself all grown up, now choosing a solo shower over bathtime and loving the special nights he gets to stay up with the adults after his little brother has gone to bed.  He loves kindergarten but also relishes his time at home with his family.  And we relish him.  Every ounce of our lovable, smart, emotional, thoughtful, kind Ethan.  I cannot believe you are already six, my sweet boy, and yet you seem wise beyond your years.  Thank you for making me a Mommy six years ago today, and for gracing our family with your unique and brilliant light ever since.




And more on Ethan at 6 (with last year's answers in parentheses):

Ethan, Age 6
Weight: 49 lbs (45 lbs)
Height: 47 inches (45 inches)
1. What is your favorite color?  Blue (Black)
2. What is your favorite toy?  The garbage truck and the crane (Bear)
3. What is your favorite fruit?  Raspberries (Watermelon) 
4. What is your favorite TV show? Curious George (Fireman Sam)
5. What is your favorite thing to eat for lunch?  Blueberry or cranberry bagel (Grilled cheese)
6. What is your favorite outfit?  T-Rex shirt with navy sweatpants [Editor's note - any "non-dressy pants", aka pants with elastic waistbands] (My Superman costume)
7. What is your favorite game?  Ten-zei (I Spy Eagle Eye) 
8. What is your favorite snack?  Squeezy yogurt and popcorn (Crackers and cheese)
9. What is your favorite animal?  Elephant (Giraffe)
10. What is your favorite song?  I don't have a favorite song.  (Lomax.  But if there was a Spiderman song, I would like that one.  Or a Batman song or a Superman song.)
11. What is your favorite book?  The Circus Ship (The Magic Treehouse books)
12. Who is your best friend?  Dylan Tolli (Emmett)
13. What is your favorite cereal?  Shredded Spoonfuls (Muesli)
14. What is your favorite thing to do outside?  Ride bikes (Ride bikes)
15. What is your favorite drink?  Milk and water (Milk)
16. What is your favorite holiday?  Christmas, no wait, my birthday (Christmas and Halloween and Valentine's Day)
17. What do you like to take to bed with you at night?  Birdie and Clipper (Bunny and Ducky)
18. What is your favorite thing to eat for breakfast?  Granola (Muesli)
19. What would you like to have for a special birthday dinner?  Tacos (Macaroni and cheese)
20. What do you want to be when you grow up?  A construction worker (A construction worker)

Birthday parfaits for breakfast...

and Famous Dave's for dinner.

A stapler!  It's the little things...

A new Geronimo Stilton book!

Thanks Molly and Jack!!

Happy Birth-week to Ethan!

I am coming to the realization that we really like birthdays in this house.  My own birthday - I couldn't care less and am perfectly happy with a quiet little celebration and calling it good and done.  But for my kids, it's quite the opposite - I very much enjoy making a big hoopla, and extending that hoopla for a week or two (or more, depending on schedules and party planning).  Birthdays are important, and why wouldn't I want to go big celebrating two of the biggest days of my life?!  So we are in the midst of Ethan's birthday week, a few friend celebrations behind us and a few family celebrations still ahead.  Ethan's actual birthday is Friday, and he's chosen to eat at Famous Dave's for dinner.  So that we will do, and Saturday we will celebrate with my family, and somewhere in there I will attempt to capture Ethan at six in a blog post...  But for now, the kid party.  We had four new kindergarten friends (plus Grandma and Grandpa) over for face painting, cape decorating, villain smashing, and lunch eating on Saturday, and our little supermen (who actually chose to be Batman and Robin - how fitting) thought it was out of this world (pun intended).

Decorating capes

The birthday boy!

And his birthday twin.  These two were born only minutes (but many miles) apart from each other back in 2007!

Two zombies, two bat-people, one Robin, and one non-face paint lover opening gifts.

A cake maker I am not, but I have fun trying.

Relaxing with Grandpa after a SUPER good time.

January

Ten days into January and the house is finally somewhat back to normal (whatever "normal" means when you have two small children).  The tree hauled into the back woods, the decorations neatly packaged up and stored in the garage until next year, homes found for all the new toys and trinkets that Santa brought.  We are firmly back in our routine, and though I am always sad to say goodbye to the whole holiday season, I am welcoming back into our lives a bit of boring.  Of course, there are two little men who would argue that life is anything but boring at this moment, with new games to learn, puzzles to assemble, a fabulous crane to fight over (seriously, how many things can we try to lift with a toy crane before that game gets old?), and should all else fail...snow!  So life is actually quite busy chez Stockwell, the nice rhythmic January busy that comes after the holiday buzz has worn off and before cabin fever sets in.

A couple of months ago, we introduced a weekly (or thereabouts) "family game night", which is really nothing more than the four of us sitting around and playing a game or two before bedtime.  But by the boys' reaction when game night comes around, you'd think it was Christmas.  They get SO excited.  Santa brought a few new games this year - Slamwich, Zingo, Operation, Old Maid, and Go Fish, all of which have been big hits with the younger set.  The boys are finally at an age where we can sit down and play a whole uninterrupted game without someone walking all over the board, the cards getting thrown across the room, or the constant refrain of "your turn.  no not your turn.  no wait your turn.  we can't go out of turn, it's his turn.  no it's my turn.  if you can't take turns, we can't play the game. who's turn is it?".  Okay, wait, that all still happens but it's somewhat more infrequent, resulting in a much less annoying and much more fun gaming experience for all.  

Operation is a tricky one!  Adam is petrified of the loud buzzer going off, so he prefers to watch others operate while thumb sucking and horsey stroking.

We've also been enjoying significantly more snow than we had throughout all of last winter.  With a nice solid base of the white stuff, there have been plenty of opportunities for sledding and skiing and snowman making.  Between Christmas and New Years, we spent a few days over at the best country inn in Western Maine Grandma and Grandpa's house, where we were wined and dined and hot-tubbed (yes, they have added a jacuzzi.  as if their house weren't already the perfect winter getaway!) and generally spoiled rotten.  After a couple of amazing skis with my partner in crime (Tom), and lots of whining about being left behind, I decided to take the boys x-country skiing.  

This was Adam's very first time on any sort of skis, and Ethan's second.  And I must say, they did great!  It was about 15 degrees, with wind chills that had to have been below zero, and these boys were moving slower than a crawl, falling every few steps, and yet absolutely loving every second.  Grandpa and Ethan took off ahead of us, and I had the pleasure of helping my littlest guy try to figure the whole parallel gliding thing out.  I couldn't imagine what part of it would be at all fun for him, and kept asking if he wanted to go back (I, myself, was frozen to the bone), but he had a gigantic grin plastered across his face and insisted we keep going and going.  Until, of course, he insisted we GO BACK RIGHT NOW I AM SO COLD MOMMY I HAVE TO GO HOME RIGHT NOW CARRY ME NOW MOMMY!  But until then, it was such a fun and successful outing with my little adventurers.  

Some pre-skiing sledding.  These boys were WORN OUT at the end of every day in winter wonderland.  Fresh air + Grandma's cooking = great sleep for all.

Other than that, we've just been hanging low and playing with all our new stuff.  Last weekend, I can't tell you the number of times I said, "boys, I have an idea.  should we (fill in the blank with a super fun activity)?".  And every time it was met with the response (from all three boys, mind you), "Nah, we're happy just staying home and playing with our new toys."  So while I fear the onset of the inevitable cabin fever, I'm enjoying these quiet times when we can settle in and nest and stay in our jammies all day and be cozy.  Because that's what January is all about.

To anyone who needs a present idea for a 4-6 year old...these are the greatest invention ever.  A dinosaur that turns into a car that turns back into a dinosaur.  Combining cars and dinosaurs and loud noises that say things like "Start your engines!"...genius!  Thanks Brian and Andrew!

This seems like a precursor to some sort of college drinking game...I can't figure out quite how, but the cups and the rapid action is a little to reminiscent of flip cups.

Both boys got cameras for Christmas, and so my photo feed is now cluttered with images like this one (trust me, this was the best of the bunch - most are completely unrecognizable).   Still, it is fun watching them walk around and snap pictures of the oddest things.  And new scrapbooks from Noni and Papi make printing the photos out all the more fun.

Hello, 2013

Well, it turns out we just don't have a whole lot of pictures from Christmas 2012.  We were too busy keeping up with the excitement of the little ones, creating magic, and having fun.  While always a wild ride, the whole Christmas weekend felt significantly more relaxed this year.  The festivities began with my family's arrival on the 22nd, and continued straight through New Years, but throughout that time, there was always an extra set (or several) of hands, a dish washer, a sous chef, a story reader, a toy assembler...not to mention the constant stream of good conversation and company.  I have to admit that I relaxed and actually, wait for it... LET GO a bit this year.  Work and timing and life made it such that I just couldn't get everything perfectly ready for everyone's arrival, so I just didn't.  I left some things to the last minute, asked for help, said "no" to things I didn't have time for, and tried to step back from time to time and take it all in.  What resulted was a communal celebration - less of an orchestrated, perfectly planned affair, and more of a warm, relaxed, cozy family gathering.  And boy did I enjoy that.  And you know what?  It was just as magical...more magical, in fact.

I loved having my family here for three lazy days before the big event.  For one, it allowed me to include my mom in the annual baking of the sand tarts (sugar cookies) - a very special tradition that we shared when I was growing up.  Once I had my own family, I took over the baking of the sand tarts (although I will never be able to make them as well as my mom does!), but really missed my mom's company in the kitchen - the conversations we'd have as she rolled out the dough, her admonishments for what I thought were secret tastes of it.  For the first time since I took over sand tart duty, my parents were able to arrive in time for my mom and I to do it together with my kids, and it was a treat.

At one point, I looked over at my very serious boys, each hard at work decorating a tray of cookies, with such earnest and determined looks on their faces, and such quiet!, and I had the urge to grab my camera.  They were just so very perfect at that moment, and I wanted to capture it on film.  But I didn't.  As a (somewhat) seasoned parent, I now know that by the time the camera is begotten, the moment has passed.  So instead, I just watched them.  I focused on their tiny faces that will not be tiny for much longer, I took in all that I could about that moment, and tried to commit it to my forever memory.  Who knows if I'll be able to recall that image in a year's time, but I can see it clear as day right now.

Which brings me to my resolutions for 2013...my goal for 2012 was to be present.  To put down the handhelds and focus on what's right here in front of me.  While I think I made great strides over the past year in this area, I now recognize that this will be a constant struggle for me, but one that I resolve to keep at in the coming year.  But this holiday season also made me realize that in order to obtain my goal, in order to be truly present in my body and my life, I need to spend a lot more time letting go.  Because there really ain't no room for soaking up a gorgeous moment when my brain is planning meals and making grocery lists and managing calendars.  When my brain is on Type A auto-pilot, the rest of me is kind of numb to the world around me.  So in 2013, my resolution is to let go.  Let go of planning perfect parties.  Let go of maximizing every minute with efficient activity.  Let go of capturing every moment on film.  Because I was there for every moment of the past two weeks.  Breathing and feeling and seeing and remembering.  And that beats a bunch of random pictures any day.

All that being said, there are some moments that are worth replaying...glad we got this one on tape.

And because this post is really all about me, some little tidbits about the rest of my family circa Christmas 2013:

• All Adam wanted for Christmas was a lion costume and a banana.  Santa came through with the banana (just like last year) but must have gotten his cats confused as Adam wound up with a (very much loved) tiger costume instead.
• Ethan's list was significantly longer, with lots of very specific items (e.g., Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom lego set - what?).  He got a few things from his list and was probably most excited about his new crane (although he asked for an excavator...Santa clearly has wax in his ears).  
• Both boys loved loved loved their stockings, especially the little jars of candy and singing toothbrushes from Uncle Pauly Santa.  I love how they are still so very easy to please, and that despite the length of Ethan's list, there were no requests for video game consoles or iphones...yet.
• My husband is the best gift giver around...massages and weekends away and weekly flowers for a summer?  Oh my!
• It IS possible to run out of wine on Christmas, especially when the Magyar/Stockwells are involved.  And no, Walmart is not open on Christmas.  Thank god for inlaws with deep wine cellars garages.  
• We are so, SO blessed to sit around a table with both sets of parents, brothers and sisters (we missed you Gwen and family!), and laugh and tell stories and play Uncle Tommy's game and genuinely enjoy each other's company.  That is by far the best gift of all!