Fall is Flying

September is coming to a close (gasp!) and we are well into the swing of fall activity.  Ethan is loving first grade, and I am loving his teacher.  We had Open House a couple of weeks ago, and Ethan was thrilled to show us around his new room, and to proudly point out that he had been named the very first "Artist of the Week"!  Although he remains quite mum about the day-to-day happenings at school, he does come home bursting with tales from the latest Mercy Watson book they are reading.  Soccer keeps  us busy a couple of days a week, and has suddenly clicked in Ethan's nearly seven year old body and brain, which is fun to watch.  He seems to have been bitten by the sports bug, always tossing the football, watching sports with Daddy, or dribbling his soccer ball.  

Ethan is confused why Daddy makes him hold his lucky football during every Pats game.

Adam is also loving school.  His transition to a new preschool was virtually seamless, and he already has a new best buddy Eli.  Eli and Adam (and five other preschool aged boys - god help those teachers) also spend Thursday mornings together at Broadturn Farm, where they tend to the animals, pick the fields, walk in the woods, make crafts, roll in the mud, and have other farm-focused fun.  I am really enjoying some extra Mommy and Adam time, and I think my little monkey is too.  We've gotten out for several hikes and walks in this gorgeous fall weather.  

Hanging out at big brother's soccer practice.

Not a bad way to spend a Friday morning...

The boys' (and their dad's) gardens are winding down for the year, which is always bittersweet.  I can't say I am disappointed that I may soon be relieved of high frequency bean preparation duty, but I will most certainly miss being able to walk out into my backyard and grab a veggie or two for dinner.  And those tomatoes...oh, those tomatoes.  They keep coming and I am trying to keep up, but how I wish I could save some for those long winter months when bland under-ripe store tomatoes are our only option.

Five little pumpkins(?) / squash(?) grew out of Ethan's compost pile this year, and have made an adorable fall display on my kitchen windowsill.

We've managed to catch up with a few friends between all the new school shenanigans, including a visit with the (now East Coast - YAY!) Doyles at the lake this past weekend.  

Chilly temperatures didn't keep those crazy kids from swimming, but we also embraced the onset of fall, with apple picking and a hike with views that showed just a few tinges of color.  These four kids jumped in without missing a beat and seemed thrilled to be in each other's company all weekend long (although they did not seem thrilled by the jammie parade and awards - parenting fail).    

Sometimes catching up with friends means meeting at the speedway.  We felt like true Mainers one night in early September, and my boys...shock and awe does not begin to describe their faces all.night.long.

Just an average night at the speedway.

And then this happened.  On purpose.

And me?  I am running running running.  This is my running season, and I can't remember a better September for running.  The air has been crisp and dry, the sun shining, that beautiful fall light in the sky.  A few weekends ago, I spent a couple of days running across New Hampshire in my third Reach the Beach relay, one of my all-time favorite things to do, EVER.  

Much deserved beers with my Van 1 buddies.

The whole Sharks team.

And next weekend I'll run the Maine half marathon and hope for as good as a run as I had last year.  And then maybe I'll get down to business and actually tackle some of these house projects I'd promised myself (and Ben) I'd complete as part of this stay-at-home gig.  In the meantime, we sure are having a lot of fun.  

Happy Fall!     

Ups and Downs

For the first time ever, I sent one of my kids to bed without dinner tonight.  I've withheld dessert many a time, an occasional bedtime story...but sending someone to bed at 6:15, listening to him wail while the rest of us tried in vain to enjoy our food, no stories, no snuggles, no nothing...it was a first.  A heart-breaking, gut-wrenching first.  I don't regret it - I knew, and still know, it was the right thing to do tonight - but that doesn't make any of it any easier.  I hope that we can all greet tomorrow with fresh eyes and calmer spirits, and that tonight will soon become water under the bridge. 

This parenting gig is a roller coaster.  Or a marathon.  No wait, an ironman.  The highs are so high and the lows so low, and some days it feels as if we alternate between the highs and the lows at an alarming pace.  There is nothing quite like the feeling of parental pride - of witnessing our children doing something great, or mastering a new skill, or saying something particularly witty, or expressing exceptional kindness.  Seeing their little faces light up with exhilaration, watching them discover the world in a new way, and being lucky enough to hop aboard their life journey with them - it's truly magical.  And thank god for those moments, because other days, parenting feels hopeless.  They're cranky, we're cranky, nothing seems to be working out the way we had planned, and that vision of perfect parenting that we've created for ourselves seems so far out of reach.  We yell, they cry...we feel as if they may have actually been put on this earth with the sole purpose of annoying us.  And then we feel guilty for even thinking such an absurdity about these pure, innocent little creatures who only want to be loved, heard, and recognized.  So we press on, starting each day with a renewed goal to do the very best we can.  To feel the highs as we crest the top of this roller coaster, and to ride out the lows, knowing that another thrilling moment is just around the bend.  

I've noticed that the universe somehow knows when we are struggling, and will often throw us a bone or two to ease the parental pains.  This week, that bone came in the form of our mini munch mastering his two-wheeler.  In true Adam form, there was absolutely no warning, no preparation, and no fanfare.  We were at the bus stop waiting for Ethan to come home from school yesterday, and Adam asked me to take his training wheels off.  After a few minutes of arguing, I said in that annoying know-it-all-mom tone, "Fine, suit yourself, you can try it."  I unscrewed his training wheels, and our little man jumped on his bike and pedaled off.  And that was that.  When I asked him when he had learned how to ride a bike, Adam's response was, "I just knew I was ready."  Watching a kid learn to ride a bike is, in my opinion, one of the most exhilarating moments we parents get.  I remember Ethan learning to ride a bike so vividly, and will remember this day with Adam forever.  The suspension of disbelief, the leap of faith as I let go of the bike, the unending smiles that spread across their faces, the beams of surprised pride emanating from their souls, as they tasted true freedom for the first time - these images are not ones that I will soon forget.  

So tonight, as I chew on the day's events, as I beat myself up, and worry, and second guess, I will instead close my eyes and picture this:  

And know that tomorrow will be a better day.

Pre-K!

With a whole lot less fanfare than his big brother, because that's just how he rolls, Adam also headed back to school this week.  But unlike Ethan, he started at a NEW school, with new friends and new teachers and a whole new schedule.  We moved Adam to a different school for his final pre-kindergarten year for many reasons, and faced a range of responses from him all summer long - everything from excitement to denial to everything in between.  But when the big day arrived, Adam was confident and proud and ready.  And while drop-off with my littlest guy is always hard (try peeling a 40 lb. boy off your leg when he really, really doesn't want you to go), and although his teachers said he "took a few minutes to warm up" (during which he hid behind a tree), the reviews upon pick-up were glowing from all parties.  As we got into the car to head home, Adam said "That was good.  SO good.  Best thing ever.  Can I go back tomorrow, and every day after that?".  I am so proud of my brave little pre-kindergartner and can't wait to see all the fun and learning and growth that this year has in store for him!

Looking a little nervous at first...

This rope ladder is, in Adam's mind, the coolest part of his new school.

He likes the see saw too.  He wanted me to see saw with him forever that first day.

My big boy!

First Grade!

As we lay in bed snuggling last night, on the eve of the first day of school (for Ethan), with all the excitement and anticipation and clean slate-dom of the start of a new school year, I shared with the boys my hopes and wishes for them this year.  I told them it would be a big year for both of them - first grade and the last year of preschool.  That they would have many opportunities to grow and learn and have fun, and that I was truly jealous of their position.  That they were both so smart and able, and I knew they could do anything they wanted.  It was one of those moments that we parents of two boys so rarely get to experience, where they were BOTH sitting still, paying attention, and really listening with their hearts and minds.  So my big pieces of advice to my first grader and my pre-kindergartner were:

1.) BE KIND.  And not just to your friends.  Seek out opportunities to be kind to those who most need it.  Look for the person who could use a little extra kindness, and go give it to them.

2.) BE POLITE.  Say please and thank you, and hello and goodbye.  Ask people what kind of day they are having (which, by the way, my quick study did as soon as he got off the bus today).  Clean up after yourself.  Don't interrupt. 

3.) STAND UP FOR WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN.  If you see something that you know in your heart and gut is not right, do something about it.  Tell the offender that they are doing wrong.  Tell a teacher. Tell us.  And at some point, god forbid, it may be an adult doing something you know is wrong.  Please tell us, and know that we will always be there to help you out.

4.) LEARN!  Listen to those wise teachers of yours and do what they say.  There is so much to be learned this year, and your little brains are so ready to take it all in.  Be willing to experiment and grow.

5.) HAVE FUN!  (It is 1st grade and preschool, after all.)

I kissed my kindergartner good night and was greeted by an excited and just a tad nervous first grader (and his equally excited little brother) this morning. 

We sent him off with a hug and a "Have so much fun!" and lots of waves, and not a single tear.  Ah, first grade feels good.  Real good.

Just Me and the Boys

Well I'm about three weeks into this stay-at-home-mommy gig (or, as I prefer to call it, my new role as CHO, or Chief Household Officer).  It has certainly taken some getting used to, but not nearly as much as I had anticipated.  For the most part, our family has fallen into this new rhythm which seems to be working quite nicely, one where we are all a bit more relaxed.  Ben has always said, "When Mom's happy, everyone's happy," and I think he may be onto something there.  While I have certainly taken on replacement jobs with my same crazy Type A zeal (our floors have never been so clean! (which isn't really saying much)), I have also surprised myself with how easily I have been able to let go of some of those old habits.  I have found it easier than ever before (or certainly since before having kids) to ignore the to-do list, take my time, listen, be just a tad more patient, and quiet my mind.  All of this I had hoped for when I made the decision to leave the working world, but it is reassuring to see it all start to come to fruition.  Of course it is too soon to really evaluate this experiment, but for now I'm happy, and for once, I'm not thinking ahead.

One obvious side benefit of being home with the boys is, well, more time with the boys!  This development has been underscored by the fact that my departure from work coincided with a sharp increase in Ben's workload.  Getting the timing right is half the battle in any big life change, but it appears we got it just right in this case.  Times like these were so stressful when we were both working - it has been a welcome relief to ride this busy period out more smoothly with one of us at home.  Sure, Ben is decidedly stressed out at work, but I think/hope he feels a little less so with me being willing and able to pick up the slack at home.

All this is to say that the boys and I have had a lot of fun, just the three of us, this August.  Soon after my retirement, we headed down to Connecticut and New York for a few days.  There was lots of fun to be had at Noni and Papi's house...

I think Stamford, CT might have the most playgrounds per capita of anywhere in the United States.

Splash Zone at Chelsea Piers

...then a thrilling night in the Big Apple, complete with "the best pizza ever", the largest ice cream cones the boys have ever been allowed to eat, the most cartoons the boys have ever been able to watch in one sitting, and an invitation to sit in an FDNY engine to boot.  What are uncles and aunts good for, if not for spoiling their nephews?  

We then began our journey northward with a trip to the Bronx Zoo - on our summer fun list, this one was eagerly anticipated and did not disappoint.

We saw probably 300 different species of animals and the "bug carousel" was the boys' favorite.

Oh, and the 4D movie.  Big hit. 

They liked the animals too...

real and otherwise...I thought this dinosaur safari was a little cheesy, but the boys ate it right up.  And I just had to post this picture...think these two are related??

I guess there is a first time for everything...at 4.75 and 6.5, our boys fell asleep in the car on the way home from Connecticut.  Broad daylight, middle of the afternoon, nary a nap for either of them in years...I guess I finally wore them out.

Since our return, we've enjoyed staying local, soaking up these last few weeks of what we Mainers await all year long.  There have been lots of trips to the beach... 

cozy mornings at home...

a couple of hikes...

I think Ben might faint when he sees that I let the boys climb this tower with a very rickety barricade atop Mt. Douglas solo.

But they thought it was pretty fun.

some bikes...

the occasional craft (far too occasional if you ask the boys)...

and many opportunities to catch up with friends.  

Dinner at The Well

Because why wouldn't you take off all your clothes when playing in a friend's backyard?

We even squeezed in some backyard camping (with Daddy!), an activity that is fast becoming a late summer tradition.

   

The days have felt long (in a good way) and though we've packed a lot in, it hasn't felt frantic or rushed.  We are all excited about Ethan starting first grade on Thursday and Adam beginning a new preschool next week.  The end of last summer was wrought with emotion, with our oldest going off to kindergarten and both of us returning to work after a magical summer off.  It is super refreshing to have this decidedly more matter-of-fact start to the school year, and the opportunity to start this new year with a fresh outlook, more time and energy, and confidence that we've made a positive change for our family.